Moments of epiphany are recherché and an unbelievably beautiful thing. Whether on a large scale or a minuscule one, the world's spinning slows for a moment and you feel your whole being click into a place of adherence and understanding. You are the key that finally fits. Waves of euphoria cleanse you and doubt, for a moment, is washed away. A whole new perspective is philosophically within your grasp and everything seems right in the world. Even the memories of these moment can motivate and invigorate who you are and what you can become.
Some would question my mental state reading the opening statement for this blog about my twenties, but believe me, there is a purpose to my musings.
I personally believe that the epiphanies we experience throughout our lives are chief motivators of our behavior. The sensation I described is literally, one of the most rewarding emotional states we can experience on this plane of existence. I know I have been personally affected.
Truth be told, and why not at this point, I get that feeling with songwriting. The rush of having music and lyrics pour out after days, weeks, and sometimes months of hard work (Pansy took seven months to complete) and the depth and emotional implications that your subconscious can produce never cease to amaze me. Composing music is still something very mystical and magical in my mind and I hope it always will be. I have studied it my whole cognitive life and still get chills, still am moved in ways I never expected. I feel that way performing too!
Maybe I'm selfish in that I want to create this feeling for myself as a career. Or perhaps this is the actual dream, to find a task that stimulates you so deeply, you are moved and epiphanies are had. It was easy as a child when everything was new and wonderful. Adulting is hard. Daily life can overtake you in an instant and your dreams seem unattainable or unworthy of your investments. That undefinable fear that lingers about lives wasted and moments lost.
Don't give up! I knew what I was meant to do the moment I first sang in front of people. Then schooling, career counseling, and a lot of bad advice got in my way. I am so grateful for the people who always believed in my talent and have supported my endeavors, as crazy as they sometimes seem. I found my epiphany, and at almost thirty can still stand behind my decisions. I honestly hope you find yours.
Always grateful that you are following your dream and your heart. Why would you want to pursue something that is not a passion? You inspire me! The day you moved to New York with no where to live, created unbelievable stress (thank goodness for your wonderful wife) Remember to take a moment and realize all you have accomplished. You have always had music in your soul. Can't wait to see what comes next.
ReplyDeleteAlways grateful that you are following your dream and your heart. Why would you want to pursue something that is not a passion? You inspire me! The day you moved to New York with no where to live, created unbelievable stress (thank goodness for your wonderful wife) Remember to take a moment and realize all you have accomplished. You have always had music in your soul. Can't wait to see what comes next.
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